Shake, Rattle and Roll XI

Excited pa naman akong mapanood ang 11th edition ng SRR

Puro mga bagitong directors ang umarangkada sa tatlong episodes

Nakakaenganyo din naman kasi ang trailer nila

Kaya ito ang pinakaunang pelikulang pinanood ko

Episode I:  DIABLO

Halatang ginaya nila ang The Exorcist sa episode na ito

So this is all about possession by the devil

Maja Salvador is a doctor here with an unpleasant past as a child

She saw how her parents and brother were murdered as she hid inside a closet

Out of the blue may kamay na humawak sa shoulder nya

That hand purportedly is the devil’s hand

Inassure sya na hindi sya nito pababayaan

Aba, parang taga DSWD ang demonyo?  Good samaritan ang drama?

Well, think again… apparently gusto sya ng devil

Naghintay lang hanggang fully developed na si Maja

Okay fine eh di naghintay nga…teka may twist pa nga pala

Si Mark Anthony Fernandez na isang pari ay dating syota ni Maja

I assume na kahit na pari na si Mark nagjejerjeran sila so Mortal Sin yun

That gives more reason for the devil to be really mad at Maja

Andyan pa si Gina Alajar sa role na tita ni Maja

Kung di lang magaling si Gina pwede nang tanggalin ang role nya

Yung bata naman na unang na-possess acted like an old person

Mas nakakatakot sya in her scary make-up than Maja

May mga scare moments din naman kasi super dilim ng scenes

In fairness, okay ang facial make-up kaso failure ang body make-up ni Maja

Acting-wise, Gina is outstanding while Mark was so-so

May portion na hindi boses ni Mark ang ginamit

As for Maja, unfortunately she has acquired a certain mannerism

Nakakunot ang kilay palagi at parang acting na acting sya

Dapat aralin nya muna ang gawa nina Ate Vi and Ate Guy

The good thing about Maja is meron syang sexy factor

Any devil would therefore wanna do her!

May special effects din ang episode – yung nahuhulog from the building

Pwede pasar pero madumi pa rin talaga.

Failure yung special effects with Mark – baduy lumabas!

I rate this episode Two Stars!

photo courtesy of www.pep.ph

Episode #2:  UKAY UKAY

Sa umpisa pa lang gusto ko nang sampalin si Ruffa

Her role is supposedly a rich socialite who loves anything vintage

The story starts with Ruffa driving her car one evening

Kasama nya ang couturier-friend nyang si John Lapus

Eh biglang may tumawid na nakaputi

When they checked it, isang puting bride’s veil ang nasa kalye

Aba ang Ruffa, sosyalera sana, eh, pinulot ang veil at iuuwi daw

Panalo ang reaction ni John kasi nandiri talaga sya

Itong si Ruffa naman nag-emote lang with her pouty upper lip

Now, let’s talk about Ruffa’s upper lip

Nakaka-distract talaga ito.  It is in itself a horror movie!

Anyway, the story goes that tatlong beses nang naunsyami ang wedding bells for Ruffa

This time, di na sya papayag at kailangang matuloy na ito

In this movie, she’s paired off with former ka-lab team, Zoren Legazpi

Zoren is still a looker.  I can take him home anytime!

So ganun na nga ang pag-build up ng story

And because of that inassume ko that she only wants the best

And the grandest for her wedding day

Ngek, eh nung nasa Ukay-Ukay sila ni John

Nakita nya ang wedding gown na mega-vintage nga

For 2,500, may-I-buy agad ang Ruffa

From hereon, the story went on a nosedive

Acting was really bad both by Ruffa and Zoren

Una, I get so distracted by her upper lip

Parang her acting life depended on it

While si Zoren naman parang nag-guest lang sa ASAP

Or baka feeling nya extension pa rin ito ng That’s Entertainment

And such a big waste si Miguel Faustmann

To make him look old, nagmukhang cheap production ang episode

Tanging wagi ever ang kawawang si John Lapus

His winning moment was when he finally confronted the killer gown

He blurted out:  “Fashion Designer ako!  Gown ka lang!”

Ultimate failure ang special effects in this episode

Failure din ang editing nila – ewan ko ba kumbakit pinilit pa ito.

I rate this episode One Star !

photo courtesy of www.pep.ph

Episode #3:  LAMANG LUPA

Para sa akin, ito ang pinakamagandang episode

Pinaka-solid in terms of story-line

And magagaling din naman mga teen actors

And in terms of scare factor – through the roof talaga

The episode starts with a road trip to a camp site

Magsyotang nagkakalabuan sina Jennica Garcia and Mart Escudero

Kasabay nila sa van sina Bangs Garcia who was surprisingly good in this episode

Kasama din nila ang childhood friend ni Bangs na si Rayver Cruz

Nasa camp site na ang kambal na Felix and Dominic Roco

And si Iya Villania na third party sa magsyotang Jennica and Mart

The campsite is creepy enough… may mga nuno sa punso kasi

Eh ang Felix inihian pa ang nuno tapos tinibag pa ni Dominic

Dun pala nakalagak ang mga bubwits ng mga lamang lupa

Kaya isa-isa silang tinigbak at pinagkakain

Wala talagang lusot kahit bida ka pa

Lahat tigbak — kinain ang puso, nginatngat ang leeg

Hanggang tanging si Jennica na lang ang natira

At sya nga ang nagkwento sa mga pulis how it happened

Nakakatuwa ang ending kasi maiinis ka sa pulis!

Anyway, this episode gets Three Stars !

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